As if we didn’t have quite enough to contend with in our first stages of life… BAM!! We’re hit with perimenopause, menopause, and a host of shitty physical and emotional symptoms that go with them! Which ISN’T helped by social media parading younger versions of ourselves making biz look super trendy and ohhh so bloody easy!! So how do we stay “relevant” in our middle age and beyond? HOW do we navigate getting older in our business??
Hey amazing you. I’m honestly so happy you’re joining me here today. Because we all know someone who hasn’t had the chance to reach their middle years ☹ So at the age of 46, I’m feeling deeply privileged to be getting older and to be able to have this conversation with you. And to be honest, I haven’t got all the answers to how we navigate getting older in biz! But I do want to share this episode with you, because I think the pressure of still looking and acting youthful as we age is a huge dilemma many of us face. And the more we can talk about it, the more we can kick that shit to the kerb, right?!!
I’ve had to do so much work on my self-esteem over the years, and for those of you who know me you’ll be thinking What the hell Nat?! But as a young 12-year-old I was actually sent to Weight Watchers! Back then society said it was the right thing to do! But unfortunately it caused me a lot of shame and the feeling that I was never enough. And I talk about how I constantly have to work on “not being enough” in my books Allergic to Perfect and Become Unstoppable. Physically I felt like that for a long time… But I’ve had to clean that mess up!! Because I don’t want my own girls to ever feel they’re not enough, or the amazing women I work with!
Does any of this sound familiar?
- You constantly compare yourself to younger versions of you, who are TikToking and Reeling and doing all the trendy marketing things.
- You feel like you’re getting left behind, that you’re no longer relevant, and that nobody would want to buy from you.
- You spent ages choosing the right profile pic, then slapped that many filters on it you looked like someone out of an ‘80s music video!
- You went right out of your comfort zone to keep up with the “younger Joneses”, and in doing so forgot about your values and your
Babe, you’re not alone! Seriously, let’s get you back on track!
How Do We Navigate Getting Older In Business?So, I’d love to share with you about one of my clients and how together we navigated getting her back on track as an older woman in biz. (You can skip to 06:10 for the whole story!).
My client is in her late 40s/early 50s with a design business, and after a lot of questioning she admitted she felt nobody wanted to buy from her because of her age! She had fallen victim to comparing herself to younger women in her business space who were doing all the fancy marketing with all the pretty things. So she decided she needed all the pretty things too and started showing up to impress everybody BUT her ideal client!
By pedestaling these younger biz women and falling into the comparison trap, she had given away her power (I also talk a lot about this in Become Unstoppable!). But importantly, she had forgotten about her ideal client and the problems she solved for them! So I shared with her what I saw as her unique selling point as a potential client, and I offered her a reframe. I’d love for you to have this reframe too.
- If a potential ideal client for her was a couple with two kids renovating their home and spending on average $5000 on spatial planning, design and fabric choices, it would be most likely that they would appreciate the life tapestry from a professional who not only had design qualifications, but hands-on experience of having and running a busy household!
Once we unlocked this insight for her, she could see that her years of life lessons and communication are skills and competencies that people still value. Knowing her clients’ needs and being able to solve these for them is a skill that lasts longer than any new marketing tactic! Her living knowledge and developing marketing skills were already enough for any potential client!
Timestamps (01:39) The privilege of aging. (03:48) My battle with self-esteem. (06:10) My client’s pain and the problem causing it! (11:14) Reframing in biz. (14:16) Pearls of wisdom. We don’t need to try and look a certain way or do all the fancy marketing tricks for people to love what we do and want to buy our products or services. What we should be doing is recognizing the unique value that comes with age and experience… We need to think of ourselves as pearls of wisdom! Are YOU wearing your pearls of wisdom with pride babe?? Cos they really bloody suit you!! “I want you to wear your pearls of wisdom, not just as an accessory, but as a statement piece!” Nat Tolhopf I’d love to know how you’re navigating this stage of life as a woman in biz. Message me, email me – I’d really love to hear from you! Nat xx
- Have a biz bud who needs a kick in the pants? Share this episode with them!…
- Need help cutting crappy comparison trap? Listen to Episode #17 – How To Quit Playing Small here.
- Check out all the episodes of Sell With Confidence on Spotify here …
- or on Apple Podcasts here…
- Read how to ditch your doubt and take imperfect action in my book Allergic to Perfect.
- Read how to stop playing small, own your expertise and elevate your biz in my NEW book Become Unstoppable.
- If you’ve read the books already and you’re like “Nat, I’m ready to rock and roll!”, then jump on a sales brainstorm with me! Hit me up about joining my butt-kicking six-month group program Sell With Success. Or get all of me with some serious 1:1 coaching! Get yourself a booking here!…